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Title : Ultima Underworld: Artifice and Artifacts
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Ultima Underworld: Artifice and Artifacts

The Avatar contemplates something rash.

        

Let's take a moment to consider the "eight arcane artifacts" collected by Sir Cabirus, of which I now have seven (the Avatar seems to have completely forgotten about rescuing kidnapped girls). They are:

    

• Book of Truth or Honesty depending on whether you go by the manual (Truth) or the in-game description (Honesty)
• Ring of Humility
• Cup of Wonder
• Shield of Valor
• Standard of Honor
• Sword Caliburn, unique in not naming a virtue, but according to its description, it could "cleave truth from falsehood."
• Taper of Sacrifice
• Wine of Compassion

        

The artifacts are a near-but-not-perfect fit with the eight virtues of the Avatar: honesty, compassion, valor, justice, honor, sacrifice, spirituality, and humility. The manual's use of "Book of Truth" was a bad idea, because not only is truth a "principle" of virtue, and not a virtue, but there was already an artifact of that name, used with the Candle of Love and the Bell of Courage to enter the Abyss in Ultima IV. If all three artifacts had made a re-appearance here, that wouldn't have been a bad idea, but it's clear from the backstory that these artifacts are a new set.

         

I obtain the Shield of Valor from a golem.

       

Though it doesn't say so anywhere, Caliburn is clearly supposed to be associated with justice. Spirituality, however, is nowhere to be seen. Instead, we get the "Cup of Wonder." It supposedly comes from an ancient oak in Skara Brae, so it has that connection to spirituality, but I question whether "wonder" and "spirituality" are truly synonyms, and even so, whether a cup is the best way to depict it. Yes, I sometimes see weird things and get a sense of awe when I'm drunk, but I wouldn't exactly call that "spiritual."

Some of the other choices are also odd. I'm all for the Standard of Honor, the Book of Honesty, and the Taper of Sacrifice. The latter is a particularly good metaphor: it "produces light only through its own destruction." On the other hand, literally displaying humility on your finger as jewelry seems a bit paradoxical. And why is wine associated with compassion? I guess we can add sympathy to the virtues we can only feel three sheets to the wind. Meanwhile, a sword only symbolizes "justice" in cases where someone has to be killed. If the person is innocent, that's not really just; that's terrifying. I don't know what should symbolize innocence--maybe a key or some kind of check for reparations. Actually, that would be a better idea: the Coin of Justice. It goes the defendant if falsely accused and to the victim otherwise. The sword should be associated with valor: the commandment to seek and destroy evil. Then you make the shield associated with compassion, because you're literally shielding people from danger. For spirituality, you make a damned ankh cross that you can carry with you, because it's the sign of spirituality (as well as the "complete" eight virtues) everywhere else in the setting. Really, how hard is this?

          

Nothing says humility like bling!

        

In any event, I started this session with the blade part of Caliburn, the Standard of Honor, and the Taper of Sacrifice. I collected the rest over the course of Levels 5 and 6.

Both levels replaced water with lava--rivers and pools of it all over the place. It was naturally deadly to fall into, but on Level 5, I found a "ghoul" who fancied himself a tailor. When I showed him my dragon scales, he made a set of fireproof "dragon skin boots" from them in exchange for some food. The boots allow me to walk freely across the lava, because lava is perfectly safe as long as it doesn't come in direct contact with your skin.

       

A scientifically-accurate screen shot.

   

Level 5 appeared to be the ruins of Sir Cabirus's administration center. It was dominated by a large "High State Chamber" with multiple alcoves overlooking it and a huge rectangular meeting table. These days, it was swarming with headless, skeletons, and giant spiders. Weeds and mushrooms grew in the corners of the formerly-noble corridors, now patrolled by ghosts.

            

Fighting a headless next to Cabirus's meeting table.

           

The southwestern part of the level was taken up by a set of "zanium" mines, and the southeastern corridors were the homes of "ghouls," basically just humans who had resorted to cannibalism to stay alive and had thus become outcast from other humans. Some of the ghouls had fallen so far that they lost their minds and became hostile--one might even say "feral"--and attacked me in the areas outside the enclave.

          

None of this explains why their language degraded.

          

The northeastern section served as the cemetery for the Abyss, with multiple rooms full of gravestones, and a ghost or skeleton standing next to just about every stone. Oddly, the whole "bullfrog" puzzle from Level 4 was dedicated to finding a back stairway down to this area, but you can reach it without having to solve that puzzle via an obvious secret door. 

            

In a world of undead, why isn't everyone just cremated?

          

Level 6 was a complicated level full of lava, platforms above and around the lava, and islands within it. It took a lot of jumping to get around the level. Within that lava, a new enemy was introduced: fire elementals. These bastards are capable of throwing actual fireballs at you. I defeated them by hiding behind nearby walls and darting out to zap them with a Wand of Lightning.

          

I'm close here, but you really don't want to get this close.

         

The southern area of Level 6 was dominated by the Seers, including about eight named NPCs who had various side-quests and hints for the artifacts. One of them, named Dominus, agreed to identify my items, which was nice, but he requires 10 gold pieces per identification. Gold is heavy to carry around. I was a little annoyed that he wouldn't take gems or gold nuggets or anything. Still, I left plenty of gold on Level 4, and after this session, I'll probably spend some time shuttling it down.

The first clue I got about an artifact was from a ghoul named Shanklick, who said the pommel for Caliburn was hidden among the tombs in the northeast section of the level. Sure enough, it was just laying there on the ground. I'm glad no one tossed it in the trash. I ran it back up to Shak on Level 2, who reunited it with the blade for 20 gold pieces.

           

This reminds me of my favorite scene in Lord of the Rings, where the elf smith assembles the broken shards of Narsil on the anvil and starts hammering away at the cracks, as if that's how broken blades are actually reforged.

            

Caliburn replaced my jeweled magic longsword. I don't care if Caliburn is technically the best weapon in the game or not. It's indestructible, it's magic, and it's a sword. No way am I adding 4 more pounds to my encumbrance to carry something else.

("Caliburn" is, of course, the original version of what would become "Excalibur" in Arthurian legend. The original form is found in Geoffrey of Monmouth's Historia Regum Britanniae of 1136. The sword is called Caledfwlch in Welsh legend and its variants include "Esclabor," "Eschaliborc," and "Estalibore." In the earliest tales featuring the Sword in the Stone, Excalibur is that sword, but in later versions, including Malory, the Sword in the Stone is a different sword, and Arthur gets Excalibur from the Lady of the Lake.)

The next artifact I found was the Ring of Humility. It should have been the first, but when I originally reached the lever puzzle in the northwest corner of Level 5, I had forgotten that one of the knights already gave me the solution.

       

Getting the Ring of Humility was a matter of flipping four switches in the right order while avoiding the center of the room.

     

On Level 6, a seer named Dr. Owl was grateful that I'd freed his associate, Murgo, from the lizardmen on the earlier level. He not only gave me a Flam rune but told me where to find the Wine of Compassion under a secret compartment in a checkerboard area of the level.

         

Is it the wine itself or the bottle that holds the enchantment?

         

The clue to the Book of Honesty came from a seer named Morlock. To get it, I had to deliver a book to him from another seer without reading it, then answer honestly when he praised me for killing a hydra. The kicker? I'd already found the Book of Honesty by just wandering around.

         

It's a good thing I remembered I hadn't killed such a beast. I kill so many things.

          

The last artifact I obtained was the Shield of Valor, held by a stone golem standing on a platform amidst a pool of lava. He warned me when I approached that he was nigh-unbeatable, and that he had been placed there to test knights.

In combat with the stone golem.

          

He was tough, but I was able to defeat him by quaffing a few potions during the battle and using my Wand of Fireball a few times. When I had the shield, I replaced my existing tower shield under the same logic as the sword above.

As far as the Cup of Wonder, I have a couple of clues but no idea what to do with them. A seer on Level 6 taught me how to use incense and a torch to have visions. I got a stark one of what I assume is the Cup of Wonder floating in space.

         

I mean, it's a nice cup, sure.

        

Meanwhile, a ghoul named Eyesnack said he used to play the flute for Sir Cabirus, who enjoyed a spiritual called "Mardin's Song of Wonder." Eyesnack taught me the notes to play it, and I have a flute, but I don't know where to play it, only that if "you play it in the right place, wondrous thing happen." Maybe it will become clear on a lower level.

        

In addition to the artifacts, there were of course plenty of side quests on the two levels. The single ankh shrine on Level 5 was tended by a mage named Anjor who wanted me to help him find a mineral called "zanium" which helps in the process of turning lower metals to gold. The dwarves apparently used to mine it in the southwest section of the level, but the mines were closed and locked by a lever puzzle.

        

I'm surprised you don't have other priorities here in the Abyss.

         

A ghoul named Kneenibble had once worked in the mines and knew the code to set the levers, but he wanted 10 fish before he'd give me the code. I had to return to an earlier level and use the fishing pole for a while.

With his code, I set the levers, entered the mine, ran around collecting zanium, and returned it to Anjor. He promised me he'd make me a huge gold nugget, but it would take an hour. I wandered away to do more exploring in the meantime and completely forgot to go back until now, as I type this. I almost don't want to. I don't have space for a huge gold nugget and don't know what I need it for anyway.

      

Fighting a ghost while collecting zanium.

       

Also on Level 5, standing on a platform amidst the lava, I encountered Judy, an old woman pining for her lost lover, Tom. She said she used to have a picture to remember him but had since lost it. I got a chill of terror when I met Judy and immediately took a save game that I'm keeping separate. The last time I played Ultima Underworld, Judy fell into the lava, and I was unable to complete the game because she has some key item. (I can't honestly remember if that was the second or only time I played this previously; it's possible that even back in the 1990s, I didn't win the game.) To test how that might have happened, I spent some time bumping into Judy, and while she does fall into the lava, she doesn't sink--she just stands there. So I'm not sure what happened the first time. I just pray it doesn't happen again.

        

This probably wasn't nice, but I had to know.

           

Of the other Level 6 seers, one of them told me that there are lost mantras that can deliver items or information when used at shrines. One powerful mantra was "divided into three parts," but she didn't know any of them. Illomo wants me to find his friend Gurstang, but I haven't yet. Ranthru wanted me to return a stolen copy of On the Properties of Runestones and increased my magic ability when I did. Fyrgen recently had a vision of some kind of demon entering our world.

    

Miscellaneous notes:

• I am heartily sick of being poisoned.

            

Argh. Enough of this.

         

• It's funny how the designers made the ghosts look like stereotypical Halloween ghosts.

         

Why not just give them cloth sheets?

             

• The toughest puzzle I faced on Level 5 was getting out of an area where a grate closed behind me. The solution was to use a key found in the area on the grate. I hope you can understand why it took me so long--what was I using the key on?

       

The key unlocks what lock?

         

• I haven't been mentioning it much, but every time I sleep, the face that started the game--I assume it's Sir Cabirus--appears in my dreams with fragments of text. He never really manages to say anything coherent.

        

". . . eat a balanced diet."

         

If you drink more than 2 bottles of regular alcohol, your vision goes wonky. If you drink more than 4, you pass out and wake up in the morning.

        

            

• Sick of encumbrance problems, I ditched my plate leggings for some leather ones, saving 4 pounds. Combat hasn't been hard enough that I need all this plate.

         

I found the final mantras to the skills on these levels. "Lore" was one of the last that I found, and afterwards I spent four slots on it, but my current level (18) still isn't enough to identify everything. I'm between 17 and 20 with "Attack," "Defense," "Sword," "Mana," and "Casting." Annoyingly, I'm about to hit the game's level maximum of 16. I'm currently at 15. That grinds my gears. A level cap should never be reachable through normal gameplay unless the player does a lot of grinding.

I stopped leveling "Search" because I seem to do well enough finding secret doors at its current level (14), and honestly, I'm not sure what the skill really does because it seems to me that every time you eyeball a secret door, it tells you. I haven't found a lock I've needed to pick in about two levels, so I stopped leveling that skill. I have not once used my 11 points in "Repair," since my items rarely degrade below "serviceable." "Swimming" no longer seems a good investment, but I suppose a few more points in "Acrobat" might have helped against some damage. Frankly, the most baffling skill to me is "Traps." Is there a single trap in the game? 

       

Some of the ways that the game teaches you mantras are amusing.

         

I am pleased to report that I at last have a complete rune bag. My last two were Flam, given to me by Dr. Owl the Seer, and Vas, the result of following a complex set of instructions from a seer named Gralwart. Perhaps now is the time to start casting more spells than In Lor ("Light"), In Mani ("Heal"), and In Mani Ylem ("Create Food").

I'll try to test more spells from the spellbook on the last two levels, especially since I've learned so many undocumented spells, like "Monster Summoning," "Sheet Lightning," and "Turn Undead" from scrolls and NPCs.

        

This would have been more useful on the earlier level.

         

As for the monsters that I might encounter to test the spells on, a quick scan of the bestiary shows that I have yet to face any golems other than the stone golem, imps, reapers, invisible "shadow beasts," or wisps.

Despite my demonstrated ability to tackle two levels at a time, I suspect the events on the next two will be complicated enough that I'll need at least two or three more entries to finish this one. Still having a great time.

Time so far: 21 hours

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